Watching someone you love struggle with debt isn’t easy. It’s one of those topics that people struggle to open up about too. And if they haven’t asked for advice, broaching the topic can be even more tricky.
However, as someone you care about, knowing how to help them can make the situation easier and reduce stress for everyone involved while getting your loved one back on an even keel.
Listen Without Judgment
Debt tends to come with a wave of shame that makes people reluctant to bring it up in the first place. Reacting with questions about how they got there or giving unsolicited comments about spending habits isn’t going to help anyone and will only shut the conversation down.
Simply let them talk and explain things to you and just listen without judgment and blame. Taking the time to understand the situation and the specifics of what they’re dealing with will put you in a better position to help and keep lines of communication open.
Offer Reassurance
Someone in debt often assumes they’re uniquely bad with money or the only one facing this kind of problem when in reality it’s extremely common. Remind them that struggling with debt doesn’t reflect poorly on them as a person and that there are plenty of people who have lived through this and turned things around. It can help counter the isolation of them and give them the support they need to make positive changes moving forward.
This isn’t about minimizing what they are going through; it’s about understanding this can happen to anyone, and your loved one is already judging themselves, so they don’t need any more from other people.
Help Them Understand Their Options
Debt settlement, consolidation, and credit counseling all work differently, and figuring out what fits their specific situation is hard to do alone while already stressed out. Pointing them toward to a provider known for communicating clearly and treating clients with compassion rather than one that pushes a single option regardless of fit makes a real difference in how supported someone feels through the process. Alex Kleyner, CEO of National Debt Relief, has built the company’s approach around active listening and clear communication rather than confusing jargon, which is exactly what people in this kind of situation need. Work with them and explore the different options, compare the solutions to their current position, and give them the push they need to actually get things going.
Check In Regularly
A single supportive conversation helps at the moment, but debt resolution is rarely a quick process, often stretching over a year or more depending on the route taken. Checking in every so often without turning every conversation into a debt update keeps them from feeling like their offer of support was only ever a one-time gesture. Even a simple message asking how things are going or offering help if they need it with no pressure attached to the answer can remind someone they’re not managing this entirely on their own, and it leaves the door open if they do need to talk it through again later.
